Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Shake Malignant Insecurity Off!

Photo grabbed here.

Insecurity is malignant.
It's like cancer that spreads throughout your life, affecting every aspect of your being.
Yes, it affects your spiritual life too.

You could be immensely insecure about your body. You see people around you with "effortlessly" great bod. You wonder why you did everything - from diet, to jogging, to going to the gym, but have never been in that great shape.
You could be insecure about your finances/career. Why were there people born with a golden spoon? Those who buy cameras, gadgets, clothes, etc. whenever they feel like spending. Those who go out of the country at least ten times a year. Those who don't really need to study anymore..
Insecurity could also envelope your thoughts on relationships. Why do others have so many friends while you only have a few, napilitan pa. Why do others have the happiest boyfie-girlfie relationship? When would God give you your honeybunch?! Hahaha
It can also be an insecurity that affects your behavior. You recalled the big sin you have, you feel somewhat trapped in it. You don't think you can do great things because of what you did in the past. You think that the same hands that committed that sin cannot do the work that is for God.
And like mine, your insecurity could rise when you evaluate your talent. Why am I trying so hard, while others who don't appear to be better in the field?

I was crying one night when I thought of my talent insecurity. Afterwards, I had my quiet time with the Lord.

First and foremost, insecurity mocks the creation of God.
One of the things Jopel told me about insecurity was that it's about looking down on yourself. When you look down on yourself, it's somehow directed to God. Because He's the one who made you. He did not just formed you, He was very thoughtful when He created you. Remember Psalm 139:14?

Insecurity is defined by Pastor James MacDonald as, "the awareness of the gap between who I want to be and who I am."

You want to be the most beautiful girl with the greatest body. But you are not.
You want to be the best artist around, and people will appreciate your work so much they bring you fame. But apparently, that's not happening yet.
You want to do great things for God. But you think that you are that disdainful sinner in your whole lifetime.

Every insecurity you have certainly has a direct or indirect impact on your worship to the Lord.
It's hard for you to appreciate His work in you, because you think you are less than who God thinks you are (and can be). You fail to see the good works God has prepared for you in advance because you are busy grieving about your flaws. You become saturated with complaints and futile requests to God, thinking that you feel empty because you are not perfect yet.. Now it sounds stupid when you read words that describe insecurity, eh? So what if you are not perfect by the world's definition? This does not keep you from experiencing God! And besides, insecurity is definitely not from God.

Moreover, when you indulge in insecurity, you are more focused on yourself and not on God!

Insecurity is manifested in many ways. Some are:
Seeking attention
Excessive Shyness
Jealousy and Distrust
Being overly critical of others
Defensive to other people's criticisms
Maintaining a safe distance from people
Tries to please men in everything she/he does
Dominating (conversations & in position/power)Confirming self-worth through boy-girl relationships
Joking inappropriately (even in expense of others' feelings)Thirsting for the best of everything (clothes, gadgets, food, trips, whatever)
(Yes, I did some research :D)

Let us honestly evaluate ourselves. Truth hurts, right? But don't worry. The truth sets you free.
When you realize that you have insecurities and lift them up to God, you would feel His healing moving through them. :)

Now what?
What do we have to do our insecurity?

1. Focus on what God wants you to be, and not what your selfishness wants you to be.
Who you are today is a significant part of who God wants you to be!
From your strengths to your weaknesses, from your assets to your flaws. These play a role in God's story in your life. Do not let the negative part of you rob you of your security.

Maybe you are not that sexy so you wouldn't be over-obsessed about your body? When I was in elementary, I remember how I would reason out why my hands are particularly rough compared to other girls' hands. I said to myself, "Siguro kaya hinayaan ni God na maging ganto, para di ako magboyfriend dahil mahihiya ako makipag-holding hands." Haha!
On a more serious note, we have to be reminded that God works in our weaknesses so the world would see His glory. (2 Corinthians 12:9) Pastor MacDonald declared, "This is the awesome thing about being a Christian. even my errors in judgment, even my foolishness, even my weakness, when I get in partnership with God, He is able to work all things for the good of those who love Him." (Romans 8:28)
It could also be possible that you are only exaggerating your flaws! You might not be as unlovely as you think. If you look at yourself with God's eyes, are you really that untalented? Are the things you complain about the truth about who you are?
Be secured in who God says you are! :)

2. Build your God story one chapter at a time.
It could be God's will to bring you across the gap between who you want to be and who you are today. Yes, He would be very willing to transform you to that person you dream to be, but not for your own sake. Rather, He would want to you to be excellent for His glory!
 I think this is especially applicable when you are insecure about the gifts God has given you. You somehow think that God wants you to be excellent, but you are not yet as good as you want to become. I tell you, that does not happen overnight. And besides, God would be with you because He would be the One to nurture your gifts into something amazing.
My weakness is that I compare the ability I have to what is on others' hands. That should never be my perspective! I know that this ability is from God. He has given me this one not to make me anxious about not measuring up to people's expectations. He has given me this one because I would have great encounters with Him as I witness His loving hands working to upgrade this gift! :)

3. Concentrate on God and not the gap.
Whether God wants to bring you across the gap or not, it is best to seek God in the situation.
You are not in a competition of who wins most approval of God!
I never imagined God saying, "Oh, you're more talented than this guy.. That's why I love you more."
So there's no need to indulge in unhealthy perfectionism!
What I say is, focus on what God wants you to be and consider who you are today as part of God's story in your life! :)

A Bible character that showed so much insecurity was Moses. When God commanded him to lead Israel, his insecurities showed. He would even choose to avoid confrontation of his insecurities, even though it could mean less chances to encounter God. The Lord assured him that He's got his back, but Moses still doubted. However, a little later in the life of Moses, God was performing miracles through him!
That's why you shouldn't fret about your weaknesses.

Insecurity tends to highlight your flaws
and downplays the power of God in you!
Shake insecurity off, don't wait for it to devour the best part of you, like cancer. ;)

If you want to hear more about insecurity, you can watch this:
Here are Part 2 and Part 3. :)

"That's whole bottom line why Satan makes you insecure. It's that he doesn't want you to step out and do what God has called you to do.
God is the cure for the insecure."

What are your insecurities? How are they manifested? How would deal with them? :)

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