"Sister-in-Law"ing 101

One of my beautiful sisters-in-law left for Qatar last Thursday.

I am blessed with two sisters-in-law (hi pretty Ate Aimee!) and a sister-in-law-to-be (hihihi pretty Ate Kamyl!)
Ate Ann was the latest legal addition.

And yet she left us too soon.. :( (well good thing that it's not for good)

So I thought I would write a blog for one of my readers (haha), my very own, Ate Ann Rafinan-Medina.

How to be a Great Sister-in-Law

Ate Ann actually showed me that a "mere" sister-in-law could actually have a big impact in a family.

The following are the things she does that makes me think so.

1. Bond with your husband's family ...a lot!

       I look at Ate Ann, and I see someone who really
wants to get to know everyone of us more. She expressed this by really investing time to go with us to places, and even a lot of effort for us. 

       Even though it was out of her comfort zone, she initiated conversations and asked us about the important stuff. Well, she generally made each of us feel that she wants to get to know us because we are already her family. I feel her genuine concern for us, and of course, her appreciation of every little thing we do. This makes us more comfortable in being with her. To me, she became more than just a sister-in-law, she became a friend. She is someone I can have so much fun with, yet she is also someone I can talk about the more serious and more personal stuff. She's literally someone I've laughed and cried with!

2. Bring your husband closer to his own family

        Relationships, well at least the immature ones, tend to snatch away the individual from his/her own family too early in the relationship. The guy spends less time with his family, as he exerts more effort to please his girlfriend. The girl has reserved almost all her affection for her guy, leaving a scanty amount for her family. While this is very common in modern relationships, this is not true with  my Ate Ann and Kuya Pao. 

        Before Kuya Pao met Ate Ann, we were relatively close (if by close, you meant teasing each other all the time and fighting round the clock). But when Ate Ann came into the picture, she inspired me to know my brother deeper. She became a connection to my brother, because she's a lady whom I can relate to more. Our conversations made me know my brother better, and actually be excited to bond with them! Haha! More than that, Ate Ann encourages my brother to show appreciation to everyone of my family. She never kept my brother to herself. Rather, she inspired him to be even more thoughtful of us. (my kuya was already thoughtful before, but now, his thoughtfulness tripled! ha! amazing!)

3. Love your husband with all your heart

His family has loved him for 26 years, and it would be tormenting to see him end up with someone who does not care about him. Ate Ann? Oh after 5 years of being in a relationship with my kuya, her love and respect for him has become very tangible. My brother can be very crazy sometimes, and Ate Ann knows well how to tame the beast! :)) I am never worried that my brother would be mistreated by her. In fact, I am very excited because I see how she helps my brother to become a better person through her love!
Aww sweeeeet :))

4. Be part of the family's journey with God

Our family have gone through a lot of ups and downs and we recognize that it is God, only God, who gave us everything we needed to overcome. That's why, it is very precious to me to see my sister-in-law, also valuing that. She also personally wanted to experience what I, we, experience in God, without someone forcing her to do so. She knows that it was never about the religion, but about the relationship with God.  

We had our first Bible Study last week, and before Ate Ann left, she gave us the privilege of enjoying it with her. That, in my perspective, took our relationship a lot deeper than ever before. My friendship with my sister-in-law became something that has an eternal value in my heart! It's something which I think is worth more than gold. :')

To my Ate Ann, if you're reading this, I just wanna let you know that I appreciate you so much. You are more than the sister I've asked for since I was little! Hahaha! This is why I cannot bring myself to send a message on the day you left - I know that writing to you means I'd be bursting with tears. It's impossible to find someone like you, you already have a unique place in my heart. I will miss you a lot! Every time I will miss you, I will whisper a prayer for you... 'Cause I know that wherever you are right now, it is God who brought you there and He has a lot of lessons for you to learn there! Share mo na lang samin ha? Hehe I love you my Ate Ann!

"A wife of noble character who can find? 

She is worth far more than rubies. 

Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. 

She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life."

Proverbs 31:10-12 

She'll Always Be My Baby!

This is one of my disciples from Arenda Church of the Nazarene.
She got married last Sunday.
And she's my baby and my love no matter what. ;)
Hinding hindi akong magsasawang makinig, maki-tawa, maki-luto, maki-kilig, at syempre, maki-worship sa labidabs kong ito. Kat, ikaw ang palaging kasama ko sa kakikayan, at kalaban ko sa kainan. Hehe.. Sana lumalim pa lalo relationship natin,
Katrina Loy-A—Ricafranca
I love you! ❤

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?

Romans 8:35

I was never self-righteous, not even once.

You never thought you were self-righteous, did you?
The title could have been echoing, maybe not in your mouth but in your heart, for so long now.

The first mark of self-righteousness is not admitting to yourself that you are, indeed, self-righteous.

From Merriam-Webster

Self-righteousness is nothing but venom.
It seems good at first, boosting your self-esteem. Boost your self-esteem too high and you arrive at a very dangerous place.

So, what does self-righteousness make you?

• Judgmental on others. All you see and all you look for are the wrong stuff people think, say or do.
• You think that you're superior over other people. You treat them accordingly, unconsciously stepping down on them with your words or with your actions.
• There's a thick wall between you and people. You never let your guards down so they wouldn't see your weakness; they, too become alarmed and not show their true self to you. Thus, a big relationship barrier.
• You think that you're better than what you really are. All you see and look for are the right things you think of, say or do.
• Blind to your own mistakes. It is hard for you to see your shortcomings or your sin.
• The same person as yesterday. Since you are in denial of your own mistakes, you would not know how you can improve.
• Prideful before God. Instead of seeing the enormous role God has in the things that happen in your life (and be humbled by it), you'll try to take the credit and exaggerate the tiny role you had in everything!! 

"There is no one righteous, not even one;" 
Romans 3:10

Boom, sampal!

Let's check out the context of this verse.
This line was said by Paul to the Romans. He was talking to the Jews, who already learned to recognized Jesus as Lord, but whose hearts were still stained by their pride in how they followed the law. This pride, or self-righteousness made them think lowly of their Gentile neighbors and might also made them the things I've listed earlier. Paul hated this pride before God, and so quoted Psalms and Ecclesiastes. Read more of this in Romans 3:9-20.

This is what the Bible says. Does this say that no one is ever pleasing in God's eyes? No, it doesn't. But it definitely says that everyone has nothing to brag before Him. Every. One. My reflection on this is that every little good thing we do, every righteous corner of our heart, were not the fruits of our righteousness. These, too, are products of His grace, are given and are inspired by God.
So if we do something good or righteous, is it fitting to credit it to ourselves? Definitely not! Because we know how weak, how unholy and how sinful we are.
The strength and the capacity to do good are all from God!
Who, then, are we to brag about what we do for Him?
(you could be a braggart in your heart, ya know, and seem to others like you're the humblest person on earth)

Also, it is hard to bear the guilt of sin, that's why we do things to keep our minds away from it - we focus on the "great things" we do!
You think that because you are such a "good person", God will try to ignore your sins.
You end up judging those who indulge in vices (if you don't), or those unbelievers. If you're holding a position in your church, you could have a tendency to look down on your laymen and think of them as less faithful. Looking so highly of yourself makes Romans 3:10 a verse hard to believe and to understand!

There was a man who committed murder and was brought into trial, before the Judge. He enumerated the good things he's done - lots of charity work, helping old people cross the road and whatnot. He used these to appeal to the Judge. Do you think the Judge would let this man's good works influence the verdict on his murder?

No matter who you have become right now, no matter the position or the number of things you do for God, it is He who brought you here. Your title or the number of years of being a believer do not justify your sins. Learn to humble yourself before God everyday, and regularly reflect on the sins you've committed, let God search your heart deeper until He transforms you through and through.

Because the one who's truly righteous is the one whose righteousness came from God, and not from the prideful self-seeker inside him.

I was the most self-righteous person that I know. God is at work with it, and I learned that humbling yourself before God and allowing Him to change that self-righteousness into something real is very liberating!

How about you? When are the times you think you're most self-righteous? How do you let God pull that poison out of your system?

Steady My Discipleship, Lord :))

This one's not the best cover of Steady My Heart out there, but I shared it anyway.

Listening to this is how I remember that disciplers should always do something fun with their disciples! Relationships are not made by merely meeting once a week, for less than 2 hours, doing something stereotypical. Learn how to really get to know your disciple! Know their hobbies and while you're at it, having fun together, you could be mentoring her in the most unique (and most personal) way! ;)

I recorded this with one of my disciples and we had lots of fun and serious talks while at it..
Guess whose voice is which. Haha

#RevolutionizingDiscipleship

He is Too Weird

He entered the church doors. Alone. This is not new to him, he's so used to going to places alone.
He came here not for the people, after all. He came here for God. 

So when it was time to praise his God with songs and dancing, He gave it his all. He seemed like he's lost it - everyone around him was staring at him. Some even laughing and throwing judging gazes. He sang and danced with such zeal, not minding the looks he's receiving.
He came here not for the people, after all. He came here for God.
..for God, who loved him and accepted him, and to whom he's never an outcast.
..for God, who tells him he is chosen and called, despite other people calling him weird or stupid.
..for God, to whom he could come as he is.
..for God, who is his beautiful Creator. 

He eagerly listened to the sermon and took to heart everything the preacher said. He was so focused on trying to absorb the wisdom in it, that he did not realize that no one dared to sit beside him.
He came here not for the people, after all. He came here for God. 

When the preacher started opening the altar for everyone who wants to respond to God, he stormed to the front. The congregation seemed to stop breathing, seeing this act - this eagerness was outrageous, bizarre, too weird. Some were distracted, the preacher's words slowly coming to a blur. Many thought, "He's really weird isn't he.." A couple of teenagers let out muffled laughter as soon as they noticed him kneeling at the altar, arms raised. Alone.
He couldn't care less about what people thought about what he just did. He came here not for the people, after all. He came here for God. And he thought, nothing is too outrageous, too bizarre or too weird, if you do it for God. 

Weeks pass. He experience the purest joy in his rich encounters with God in church.
But he couldn't hide it. He struggled in that very place. Entering that church did not free him from the bullying he experiences in the world outside its doors. He's used to being laughed at, but there are plenty of times when he wished he'd be taken seriously. He cried out to God, "Are they really your disciples? Shouldn't Your disciples follow the way You love?" Knowing that hating on them is not how he should deal with this, he kept on repeating to himself: 

"I came here not for the people, after all. I came here for my God." 

But this mantra could only go so far. It lost its healing effect little by little with every laugh he heard, with every insulting joke thrown at him, with every stare he received and with every moment he felt like he was the star of another clique's inside joke, repeatedly stabbed behind his back.

He never imagined it would be this way when he first entered the church doors. Now it felt like being accepted and loved were all a far-away fantasy. He can hardly remember how he felt when he first experienced God's warm embrace, when he had the joy of discovering where he truly belonged - in God's arms. All these faded from his memory as he was being bombarded by all these cold insults. Will he ever be loved? Will he ever be accepted? If, even the church itself, who are ought to be known to have the most genuine love, rejected him, who else will offer him an authentic smile and welcome? He's too weary in his quest of finding the love he's always thirsted for. He found it in God, but this discovery was stained by the constant insult he received from those who claimed to follow this God. He lost faith in true love, he thought that he would never receive the love that God said he would. He thought to himself,
"I was meant to be an outcast."
And so he stormed away from the altar out of the church doors and never came back again.

Jennifer Lawrence gif grabbed here.

"By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” 

Jesus said this in John 13:35.

Will you call yourself a follower of Jesus if you screen the people who you will love?

Jesus showed an extreme love by reaching out to the outcasts - He sat down and ate with tax collectors, and defended a prostitute against religious leaders. We are called to do the same. If we just would follow His example, we would experience the greatest surprise - how much of a seeker of God are these people labeled "outcasts" by the world!

#RevolutionizingLove

Who are the people you know who are labeled "outcasts" or "weird" by this world? How do you show God's love to them?

Sunrise Offering

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

- Romans 12:1-2

Early this morning, Jopel and I jogged and had our first early morning devotion. It was a great experience, even though it was a real struggle waking up at 4am and shaking the body's defiance to the early task.

We talked about how we may conform to the pattern of this world quite unconsciously. We may not be taking drugs, or doing some really "bad stuff", but the mere fact that we worry about our future too much, or we take blessings for granted, or we do not offer every time and everything we have to God, shows that there are times we obliviously conform to the lifestyle the world dictates to us.

We also meditated on how we are being living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God. Living in this world, somehow feeling like we're indeed part of it, it is easy to occupy yourself with how to make your lifestyle comfortable and pain-free. In this world full of hurt, people yearn for that care-free living. Christians could be blindly following this pattern, forgetting to sacrifice for God's work and instead put all their heart and hardwork in investing in their careers, future home, etc, that could be pleasing only to the selfish desires and not to God.

The renewing of our minds indeed plays a big part if we want to change how we were. Analyzing our past actions, where they came from, what our purpose were while doing them, and what was crooked with our perspectives could initiate a drastic change in the way we live our everyday.

There were many other thoughts and realizations that made us experience God together this morning. It was a great time reflecting on what God has been doing in our lives individually. Personally, I think that couples should have devotions together. They do not just make you two experience God in a very special way..

They also keep you from being side-tracked and from focusing on the sweety feely emotions.

They remind you that your relationship, yes, even your relationship should be for the Lord, and for the Lord alone.

In everything you do as patners, may it be a fragrant offering to the One who gave you each other.

#RevolutionizingRelationships

How about you? If you're in a relationship, what are the things you do to keep focused on God, so that you would not conform to the patterns of relationships of this world?

Let's Revolutionize the Love Month!

February.

We know it's here when hearts, teddy bears, red decors surround us wherever we go!

It's when the gift shops, restaurants and other romantic places intentionally give discounts and promos.

..as if nudging you to buy something for your loved one.

And by loved one, you know what I mean.

Other half. Life partner. Boyfriend/Girlfriend.

Sinta, giliw, mahal.

Not everyone likes February. Because it makes some people SAD.

Cause it's the dreaded Single-Awareness Day, they say.

But why do we overemphasize couples during the Love Month, when love is an intense verb that we give to more than one person.

Love is something we share with the people who were heaven-sent and were meant to make our lives a lot brighter!  

Being single myself, I choose to spend this month to appreciate the people who have filled my life with love.. that makes me see that you don't have to have a boyfriend to experience love!

And for the first day of the love week..

Day 1

My Mom 

This woman is the most amazing woman in the world!

She was (and still is) the person who have taught me and showed me how to love with the love of the Lord. She is actively demonstrating this gracious yet disciplining love 24/7.
She gives me a picture of a woman who, every single time I know, chooses to serve others.

I become sad whenever I think of the days when I chose to be rebellious and to maintain a safe distance between her. But when a "friend" called her crazy when she was just expressing her overflowing love in outrageous ways, I was shocked at how this friend can be so hateful at someone so loving!
That was the time I realized that my mom was the Best Friend I always wanted and needed!
Not the ones I met in school. Not the ones I meet just anywhere.
No, I haven't yet found someone who would exceed the love the she could give!
She is someone filled with wisdom and understanding that makes me seek her thoughts and blessing in every endeavor I make.

My mom is the most amazing mom in the world!
And it's not even mother's day that drives me to say this.. (lol)
It's my 20 years of experience of being her daughter that makes me say so.

I LOVE YOU MOM!!

Even Trees Bear Fruit in Season

Three of my small group members just participated Gencounter last Saturday.

It is an activity in our Congregation that marks the beginning of the new chapter in the lives of believers of God who are ready to be used in ministries.

After years of learning about discipleship, I realize that we cannot force anyone to grow. All we could do is do our best in our little role in our disciple's growth. One's spiritual growth is not from her spiritual mentor. It's not even from herself. A person's growth ultimately comes from God.
And so it's something that would softly come in His time.
Even trees bear fruit in season!
With lots of prayers, Claudine, CL and Hannah participated that activity.

Claudine

"A nice encounter with God :-)

I learned a lot :))

Lord thank you for your unfailing love you :D 

to your blood and flesh you shed in the CROSS

Everyday i thank you for your grace you given to us :D 

I surrender all my life :-)

Let your will be done :))

AMEN"

Hannah

"I'm blessed to have encountered God today! But it's not the last time I'll be encountering him, it's just the start. I'm looking forward on encountering God each day of my life. So excited for what He has in store for me! Don't miss out on God's wonderful plan for your life :D

Live out your faith and SHARE it."

CL

"Things happen for a reason whether it's good or not, my past experiences is really a nightmare, indeed! i thought it was the end, "giving up" to follow God is next to my mind, but know what? God is Good! cause He never stop loving me, He never stop calling me and He never give up on me. He is my healer. All the brokenness inside, all the wounds, he heals me. And today, i had a great ENCOUNTER with Him again. I'll praise God for giving me this opportunity. He brought me this far, and now, i want to follow God and brings all the glory and praises to Him. My Lord and Savior..He takes me out of the dark :)) ♥"

I do not see being these girls' spiritual momma as a strenuous duty.

It was a great privilege, an undeserved opportunity, a beautiful encounter with God.

There were times when I almost gave up as I saw how weak I was. It scared me. I was worried that my weaknesses would affect these girls negatively, and that my lapses would cause them to stumble. For almost 2 years and more, God taught me a lot of things in being a small group leader.

Being a small group leader is never about me!

It is ultimately about God.  

They are just three of the girls I love most! 

I know my face looks like it's about to burst in this picture, but I don't care.. It's that one picture I had with the three of them during Gencounter so I'm posting it! Hahahahaha

Best to keep distraction away. FOCUS to encountering God.

Saying good bye to distractions to wholly absorb everything.

With some of our friends, Michelle, Je Ann and Schae. 

I am so so so blessed to witness your journey with the Lord!

You have taught me a lot of things about humility, servanthood, and op cors, love.

There are a lot more to learn for all of us. I am so blessed to have the opportunity to do it with you!

You know how much of an open book my life is for you. Haha I'm willing to bare all of me, to make every part of  me available to you. My goal is to impart to you every little lesson I learned (and am still learning) from my personal journey with the King. With these parcels of wisdom, along with the lessons you learn from your own personal journey with God, grow deeper in your faith.

I love you! Now that God has led you this far, offer Him your best. I know He has great plans for your lives, He has ministries prepared for you to do.

Just keep fighting, lady warriors! 

P. S. If God touches your heart to pray for them, please do so. Let raising up Christ-like leaders be ever in our hearts.

Always Respond with Love

 Miriam Quiambao, Paula Salvosa a.k.a. Amalayer, Janine Tugonon.

How are they similar?

They all stirred controversies.

One expressed opinions on homosexuality and stirred the LGBT community.

One had an encounter with the lady guard and had her outburst caught on cam.

One had her decisions on love and friendship exposed for all the world to know.

How else are these three similar?

They are Christians. They are fellow believers. (Welcome to the family, Paula! ♡)

This saddens me every time a new controversy arises about a brother or a sister in Christ.

Not because of having the "religion" humiliated, but because I see how unloving this world is becoming. ☹

What pains me more is how some Christians actually do some of the bashing, all for the wrong reasons.. ☹ 

To exhibit your knowledge about the law?

To showcase your "admirably sound" judgment?

To show people how much wisdom you have in your opinions?

Most of the time, this is done unmindfully.

We become a little too forgetful of what the message of Christianity really is.

Our role in this world is not to judge.

That is not our job. Judgment belongs only to God.

Our role is to show the world how much Jesus loves everyone - including these people with such controversies.
It is our job to show the world the much broader (and wiser) perspective only God could enable us to see.

Because of the worlds-apart distance between us and these much-celebrated figures, we forget that they are actual people, like any of us.

Like us, they have their own share of mistakes.

Look back at those moments in your life when you said something you regret, or did something that was even worse than what some of them did. If everything you do, 24/7, is televised, would it create as much controversy? How would the people who know you react?
It would indeed be controversial.
We all have our share of failures and mistakes. We all share shameful acts and embarassing decisions.

That's why we have no right to judge what they do.
Especially that...

Like us, they are misunderstood. 

We don't have any license to say anything bad about anyone, because our knowledge of their situation is very limited to what the media tells us... We should not talk bad about them, even though everyone already does it. We don't even know them personally, and we just assume with the very few details presented to us by fellow gossipers.

Pano mo nalamang di siya marunong magmahal? Tropa mo?! Hahaha

When we hear other people judging us without even knowing us personally, we are enraged.
We want to punch the person in the face with our facts that would prove them wrong.

But when it comes to these popular people, we easily overlook our unfair and harsh judgment.
That's how selfish we are: When it's you who is hastily judged, you get angry. But when it's you who gives hasty judgments, you don't think twice at all.

We cannot even define who they are through the very few details we know about them.
Do you want to be defined by perverted information about you? Of course not!
You don't even want your failures to define who you are.
That's not the way we want to be looked at.
That's not the way Jesus looks at them.

I know how we could get over-reacting, especially when it is a fellow believer who is the center of the controversy. We also get over-judging when the issue challenges our beliefs!
I know, because I reacted unlovingly when I first heard about the Amalayer incident (with Paula Salvosa).
I laughed at what happened, watched all the parodies, and barely thought of her as an person who is cyberbullied. I forgot that she is someone whom God loves. ☹
It was until I watched her testimony, where she shared how one outburst at the LRT Station almost ruined her life, that my perspective about such issues was rebuked by God.

I was surprised when I realized how a simple tweet of 140 characters, but filled with God's love, changed her life.

A little prayer. An encouragement. An effort to put an end to the waves of discouragement and bashing.
What these real people need is a reminder of God's love.
Not our "righteous" opinions.

Not satiric parodies of their mistakes.

Not even in-your-face tweets or statuses.

In the end, what everyone needs is love.

In the thoughts you drown your mind with, and in the things you say..
In everything you do, have your ❤ checked by your Master.

How do you respond when you hear about issues about other people?

You call it love?

Photo grabbed here

It started when David sinned because of his admiration (of the body) of Bathsheba. (which he "accidentally" saw while she was taking a bath)

It caused him to do things that did not only displease God, but also did harm to him and his family.

When Nathan, the prophet, rebuked David, he also told the king that his family will absolutely be affected by this. Shortly after that, his son Amnon, raped his daughter (from a different mother) Tamar.

His family was not affected through tragic natural events.

His family was affected by the venom of lust.

As David's encounter with Bathsheba was retold by 2 Samuel's writer,
not once was love mentioned. On the whole chapter was the shadow of lust and what it can do to a man's prudence.

In the retelling of Amnon's story, love was mentioned ... by the violator himself.

"I'm in love with Tamar..." (2 Samuel 13:4)

This could have been a very sweet line, if he uttered the word love and meant the wondrous truth of that big word.

However, reading the next verses, we would see how he carefully planned his assault on the helpless virgin. ☹ He heeded the counsel of a wicked friend. He did not think of any of the possible consequences, and only thought of the immediate pleasure he'd get. He was willing to deceive his own father. He did not respect the one he "loved" (he called it love, but it was clearly not). He did not care if it would make a fool out of him. He knew he could actually get her as his wife, but did not have the patience for the process. (2 Samuel 13:13) He did not want to wait.

What happened right after he took advantage of her?

He was filled with "intense" hatred towards her!

"In fact, he hated her more than he loved her."

(2 Samuel 13:15)

Could hate really co-exist with love? Not the love that Jesus teaches us. No, it cannot co-exist with hate.

Because of Amnon's selfish decisions, many were affected. Tamar was disgraced. Absalom was filled with hatred and killed Amnon. Their other brothers had stained their hands with helping Absalom in the murder. King David became furious, and lost a son soon after.

We might think that those stuff were too much.

But hey, that's what "pirated" love, or mere infatuation, could do.

This is still very relevant in our generation.

How many times did you, or a friend of yours, proclaimed "love" for someone you barely know?

How many times did "love" make you do crazy things that compromised a lot of things?

How many times did this kind of "love" negatively affect people around you and inflicted hurt to so many people? (e.g. your parents, your friends, your ex-boyfriend/ex-girlfriend)

How do we know we are only infatuated and not in love? (Based on 2 Samuel 13)

1. You seek and follow advice from those who'd approve of your selfishness.

You know how much your friends get giddy over your feelings for that girl. But no, you would not want to talk about it with your parents. Talking about it with your spiritual mentor is just out of the question - you know he would not approve. Seeking advice from them would also mean putting out the flame of the kilig in liking someone this "perfect".

2. You are willing to break the rules, even of God Himself.

You know how much it affects your spiritual life, as well as your enthusiasm in your ministry in your school, in your church. You know how much God disapproves. You know it. Every time you hear the sermon, you suddenly think of your feelings for that girl as if God is telling you to do something about it. You are uneasy talking about it in a more truthful perspective. You are just not comfortable putting side by side your girl's name and the condition of your walk with God. That... could mean you're breaking His rules.

2. You are willing to do things that will inflict hurt on others.

Based on my experience, I was willing to hurt my family because of how much I liked that boy. And I think that's one of the most common "sacrifices" of young girls.. "I'm willing to disobey my father, and lie about it, I like you that much." "I'm willing to spend less time with my friends and spend all of my time on you, I like you that much." "I'm willing to forget my morals and just indulge in our love.. It's you, me, against the world."

We become this blinded, while the people who truly love us, stand at a distance, grieving as they see how much our unhealthy feelings devour us and keep us from being the best that we can be.

Sometimes, we also deliberately hurt other people as we try to pave a way to satisfy our own desires.

3. You only consider your own happiness.

You think you love him until you learn you love yourself more; the real you would be willing to have her joy compromised just to serve you your "well-deserved" joy. You think you love the guy but you demand too much time from him, because your greedy self has emotional needs you want him to satisfy. You pull the girl's hand to a dark cave, away from other people who also love her, just so you could get all that you need from her, emotional needs, physical needs, etc.

4. You are not willing to wait.

We somehow have to wait for God's perfect time, where God gives the go signal. God has a reason why we have to wait for the best things in life. He does not want us to merely wait for the perfect circumstance for what we want to happen.

It is about what happens "while we wait". You'd encounter God deeper as He cleanses your heart and prepares it for the time He would give that thing you are waiting for. (which apparently would be better than how you imagine it to be while waiting) He wants everything to be perfect so that we would experience the joy to the fullest! If we grab the gift too soon, the joy that comes with it would not be as rich as the joy He really intends to give ya.

But fret not, God knows how distorted our ideas on love would be. He does not want us to be hurt no more. He does not want us to hurt his other children.. That's why He offers free lessons on true love! We would not learn about it from other people. A relationship with Him would be the best classroom in learning how to truly love! ♡

Do not be a modern-day Amnon and settle with infatuation.

(which our immature selves could call love)

True love has a waaay better offer.

Have you had past experiences where you've mistaken infatuation for love? 

Purity Ring

The word purity makes everyone feel alienated, doesn’t it?

Yes, we can relate it to objects, pure carrot juice. We can use that term for details about us like, pure Pinoy. But us, our insides, our intentions, our motivations, what our hands do, what our mouths say, what our minds think, pure? Eek. It’s hard to own the word purity.

You know why? It’s because we grew up in a world where purity isn’t taken seriously. We live in a world were impurity is not just tolerated, it is also allowed to grow. It’s like saying, “Oh, go on. Ruin your life, that’s okay. How else would you learn life's lessons? Nobody’s perfect.”

The Bible tells us otherwise. It tells us to pursue purity. Intentionally pursue it. Isn’t that an indication that pursuing purity is not in vain? Pursuing purity brings people somewhere, it’s a quest that has a destination. People would say that nobody is perfect, and that somehow poses the question, “Why even try?” But what does the wisdom of this earth compare to the wisdom that is from heaven? The Bible knows better. God knows better. You would never ask a dog to do your homework, would you? Because the dog simply can’t do that. You’re stupid if you ask your dog to do something beyond its capabilities. Our God is wisdom Himself, so He definitely knows what He was saying when He commanded us to be holy. We can pursue holiness.
(Leviticus 11:44 | 1 Thessalonians 4:7)

After all, our Father is holy. (1 Peter 1:14-16)

That is why I was inspired to pursue purity in a more profound and more prayerful way.

Can only pursue purity with the guidance of the Holy Bible, with the guidance of my Holy Father.

I bought myself this purity ring last February 14. My mom wanted to sponsor me, so I let her give me money for this. I explained to her what this is all about.

I think that a purity ring is not about the design or the engraved letters on the ring. It is mostly about how much you want your heart to be after God’s own heart in every situation. I was thinking of this when I bought the ring, that’s why I chose a design like that, to remind me of this thought.. Hehe.

Pursuing purity is. Pursuing purity is more than just following the instructions written on the Bible. It's not being the perfect person in one millisecond. It is being distinct and going against the notion of complacency! Once you see the beauty of purity, you'll be 100% willing to embrace it, and to give up everything, even your selfish desires, to be soaked in it.

Pursuing purity is the desire to be one with God, to have the same heart as Him. When one pursues purity, he opens himself up to encounter God even more. The little hindrances in fully encountering Him are shook off one by one. Thus, Hebrews 12:14 says, "Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. "

Moreover, purity paves the way for us to maximize ourselves in serving God. Impurity has its negative effects. It kills the enthusiasm in serving God. It fills you with guilt that you lose time to dream about your ministry. Somehow, allowing sin to eat you up gives the enemy a chance to pull down you morale and make you think that you weren't made to do great thing for the kingdom. The gist of this is beautifully crafted by Paul in his letter to Timothy, "Those who cleanse themselves from the latter will be instruments for special purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work." (2 Timothy 2:21) 

Pursuing purity is the purpose of our lives – to be Christ-like. It is the only way to truly live. I have pondered on life's purpose for years already. Realizing the power of God that could work in our lives, I can see no other alternative! We were made to enjoy purity, not to suffer from the consequences of our selfishness. Our Lord Jesus Christ did not endure the cross, the spits of mere men, the insults, just so you could have a license to dwell in wickedness and still have a chance to repent in the latter part of your life. He did that because He sincerely wants us to experience the fullness of living in purity.

Pursuing purity isn't living everyday with a heavy heart desperate for purity.. It gives you 24/7 joy, the most genuine and lasting joy! :)

To sum it all up:

1. Pursuing purity allows you to fully encounter God. (Hebrews 12:14)

2. Pursuing purity allows you to do all the things you were called to do. (2 Timothy 2:21)

3. Pursuing purity is the only way to truly live.

Purity is a lifestyle. It is not just about what we do with our hands. It has everything to do with what goes on in our minds, and in our hearts.

Purity in thought is as important as our deeds. Having impure thoughts may seem innocent, but it is as filthy and stinkin’ as our actions. Purity in our hearts is, I think, the most important. After all, it is the wellspring of life. (Proverbs 4:23) Whatever that’s in it directs what goes on in our minds and what our hands do.

At first, I only thought of being pure in sexuality, because purity has always been related to the True Love Waits campaign. I only wanted to be pure in that aspect. However, after almost a month of meditating on it, I realize that purity is definitely more than that! We also see that in the Bible verse I am inspired with in this quest to purity.

Ephesians 5:3

I like how the ring encircles the word love. Indeed, I pursue purity out of love!

These are some of the things God inspires me to do:

(I don't want to impose these to everyone, I made this list as a reminder to myself, according to my convictions)

Purity in Relationships:

•  Dress modestly.
•  Avoid watching sexy stuff. (with kissing scenes or whatever, I wanna be like kids who are ilang when they see hot scenes. The world has made us a little too used to those.)
•  Don’t be too friendly with guys, texting and stuff.  If for the purpose of sharing the gospel, I should know my limitations. Also, I would do this as way to respect the guy I’m praying for. ;)
•  Don't be too comfortable with guys that you become obliviously physically intimate. You might not know the impact of "innocent" placement of hands. (haha the serious tone makes it sound creepy)
•  Pray constantly for Jopel and I’s purity. Evaluate from time to time. Here’s a fun fact: every 7^th of every month, we celebrate Purity Day where we assess our purity and pray for it. This started just yesterday! Haha exciting!

Purity in General:

•  Avoid unhealthy media (books, TV shows, songs, movies, etc). When you take garbage into your system, you’d stink with garbage.
•  Kill idle times – do something worthwhile every second!
• Well that also means that I should not go to time-killing websites like 9gag. Don’t stay too long in Facebook, unless the reason I’m there is to be a blessing to others.
•  Speaking of 9gag, avoid indulging in entertainment that sees women as objects, sees gaming as real life, offers faulty relationship advice, and mocks Christianity. So you realize that foreign animated series like Family Guy also have the same themes? Don't soak in them. ;)
•  Don’t stay up late – it robs you of the energy to serve God and people the next day.
•  Have a healthy diet. Having a healthy body is definitely a soldier's concern! ;) No to junk foods, soft drinks, sugary stuff. Well, okay.. You could eat those, but in moderation. (1 Corinthians 10:31)
•  Consult everything – EVERYTHING – to God. You know how God appreciates it in the Old Testament.
•  Be cautious of every word that comes out of the mouth.
•  Look at everyone with God’s love.
•  Grab every opportunity to be a blessing.
•  Never ever miss a quiet time.
•  Be prayerful in everything.

Excuse my annoying face.. Hahahaha what can I do?
I'm excited with this brand new stuff :)

I am making a blog post about this as a symbol of my covenant (with this ring). Yea, they're mere symbols of what God is inspiring me to do.  Writing these stuff doesn’t mean I am already perfect in doing them.. What’s the sense of having a purity ring if I claim to be pure already? Hahaha! I'm sure that this list will grow even longer as my Lord continues to open my eyes to the beauty of purity.

So far, I have been enjoying a great time being purified by my Refiner. After all, we can never make ourselves pure. Only by grace, by the strength and inspiration that comes from Him, could we ever become pure.

What do you do to allow God to purify you? :)

Partners in Service

Last Sunday, Jopel and I went to Arenda for their 2nd Anniversary, with the theme Overcome.

While waiting for the service to start, I met these pretty young ladies and talked with them :)

All of them were wearing pink. They had yellow strips of fabric which they asked me to style for them. :) I tied them into headbands and bracelets. Hihi I'm not much of an artist but these kids sure saw me as a very creative ate :P

I was shocked hearing their stories. They talked about rapists, killers, traumatized boys.. Woah! My head turned while I was talking to them. I mourn at how exposed they are to the wickedness of this world, as young as they are.. :(

Praise & Worship.

(I'm sorry Joy, the Worship Team's pianist, I can't take any picture of you that night.. Laging may nakaharang)

 My camera was not so cooperative that night. But I thank God that I still managed to get a few souvenirs from last night :)

He talked about how to be victorious, how to overcome. The text was Joshua 1.

1. Hold onto God's promises.

When someone tells us what to do, we don't just automatically do it. We somehow assess why we should do it. And when we see the good outcome, that's when we decide to actually to it. It's the same with winning a war. When God tells us to fight, like fighting

2. Engage in the war.

There are no wars to be victorious in, when you are not fighting at all.

How do you taste victory if you don't even engage in war? When you see the enemy, fight it! Don't ignore and expect triumph. Haha!

3. Be strong and courageous.
Our Father, our army's King, can defeat anyone and destroy anything. May it be your sins, your struggles, your problems, your weakness.. Name it, and He can defeat it! However, if we His soldiers, His hands and feet in this land, would be too cowardly, this won't happen. We won't experience the triumph God wants to share with His soldiers who are willing to participate!

Last January, Gencon was moved to 4pm, which conflicted with our commitments to Arenda. We had to choose between Gencon and Arenda. We prayed for it hard, until God showed us everything that was happening with Gencon (MMF ministry), and we knew it’s the best time to be a breathing and kicking part of Gencon! So we had to talk to the young people that we had to say good bye. We did not know how long we would have to miss Arenda. This March, their Second Anniversary, Overcome, brought us back to our dear young people in Arenda! J

Jopel and I have been going to Arenda since 2010, I guess? In my post about my friendship with Jopel, I talked about working in the ministry with him. Here’s a picture from last year, after the youth group’s first anniversary.

We thought of taking a picture as a remembrance after everything..
We were too busy praying and preparing before and during the service! Haha!

Apparently, Jopel was also the “surprise” speaker in their first anniversary, March last year. The anticipated speaker suddenly texted that circumstances changed and he cannot go to Arenda. Only 30 minutes before the service started did Jopel start doing his sermon for that night! He finished his sermon in a fleeting 30-minute adrenaline rush! Haha I remember that day, I did not know how to help him. I just sat in the far end of the room and prayed for him and his sermon.

God is really amazing! That night was definitely a night of revival. I thought his sermon that night was very powerful. I stood there in awe of what God’s grace can do, especially when circumstances aren't too cooperative. 

Partners in Crime Service

It is my first time to have a ministry partner like Jopel. For a friendship like ours, where we pray for each other and constantly ask God what He wants for our relationship, being ministry partners is a big avenue where we encounter God together.

Prayer sure is important in any boy-girl relationships. (Especially when you two have feelings for each other) Because when emotions are involved, temptations tango around you.

Likewise, ministry gives two people a deeper encounter with their Lord. (and brushes away unnecessary idle moments of sweet-sweet-an lang, sana sa ministry na lang ginastos yung perang pinangdate at yung time na na-spend, nag-away din naman after ng date) Hahaha!

Well, let me explain it in a different light.

Ministry should be the lifestyle of any boy-girl relationship that aims to glorify God! It should not be a mere compensation.

No way! Ministry should never be a bribe to God so He would bless your relationship. For example, “We say that Jesus is the center of our relationship, that’s why we should at least give a poor kid some food together or somethin’.. Jesus being the center of our relationship would make us last.” No way, sistarr! Don’t do that for the wrong reasons. Don’t do it half-heartedly. Don’t even do ministry just so the people around you will approve of your friendship. No way! The truth will stink eventually.

Ministry should not be an accessory, Christian couples! Ministry should be the main purpose of your relationship. Well, that is, if God is really the super glue that attaches you two together.

Firstly, you should minister to each other. You should encourage each other to grow deeper into faith. You two should be a light to each other, inspiring one another to seek God even more. You should learn how to help each other seek a sweeter relationship with God, more than seeking a sweeterrelationship between you two.

 If you are a blessing to each other, in the richest sense of the word “blessing”, it will extend to the people around you. You two would learn to love the people around you even more, and prevent the unhealthy mentality of having your worlds revolve around each other. It’s like being so overflowing with the unconditional love from God and with love from him, that you can’t help but love all the other people around you! J

A mutual desire to serve God could eventually lead you two to a ministry you’ll do together. In our case,  we go to Arenda together. I have a passion in discipling women while Jopel has a deep desire to be a pastor. Somehow, these two hearts willing to serve are perfectly woven together to make the ministry work.

Having a ministry together constantly reminds me that our friendship is not given by God to just to satisfy our flesh’s desire. God intended friendships like this for something greater than that! Mere satisfaction of emotional and physical and whatever needs is shallow. I cannot imagine any relationship that aims to glorify God that does not have a vision to have a ministry together. Well, at least to encourage each other to devotedly pursue a ministry!

True enough, the greatest moments in our friendship are not the moments when we give each other letters nor having an expensive inner. The most precious moments we have are those times when we experience God in the most personal way.. While we stand beside each other! J

If you are in a relationship, what ministry are you dreaming to do together? How do you support each other in your individual ministries? J